Perfect Children (of God)

Now that I am an expectant father my perspective has begun to shift. Rarely if ever did I get upset with parents of unruly children, but now that I have no clue how my preacher’s kid will act I feel even less critical. I find that I am quietly observing parenting techniques for raising well-rounded children. It appears that a mix of discipline, love, diligence, sacrifice, patience, and perseverance is crucial. What I am also discovering is that when I am around parents—even those with grown children—I am getting a lot of sage wisdom.

Mentally I am writing down this parenting acumen. Sleep when the baby is sleeping. Mylicon drops help to relieve gas. Get someone to throw a diaper shower to stock up on the first few months of changing supplies. Of course, I struggle not to get ahead of myself, as I really like to plan everything out far, far in advance.

Take for example the other night, Kim and I were out walking and I began mapping out the highest levels of lessons that I hoped our child will one day learn: self-actualization, laying down one’s life for a friend, self-sacrifice, enlightenment, and even union with God. As she shot me a sideways, knowing kind of glance, I said, “Now, all we have to do is track back down from there to the lower levels, like walking, potty training, and manners.” I know, I am ridiculous. On the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator I am a Judging type, which sounds worse than it is. The Judging types want a more structured and decided life, like planning out every step of their children’s lives, as opposed to a Perceiving types who are more willing to go with the flow.

Reflecting on my craziness in that conversation, I recognize that I have not nailed down too many of the higher level lessons myself. Sure I’ve learned walking, potty training, and some manners, but spoiler alert there is more to growing up into a disciple of Christ Jesus than just social etiquette. And, following Him is more than just being nice. As shocking as this is going to sound, Jesus did not live a well-mannered life! In fact, in Matthew’s telling of the Good News, the core message of Jesus’ ministry, the Sermon on the Mount, flew in the face of the prevailing practices of the day—the manners, if you will, of his time.

The statements which Jesus started, “You have heard that it was said…” were the prevalent ways. If someone poked out your eye, it was reasonable for you to take his in return. When one slapped you across the face, you were to retaliate with a slap of your own. If a person took your coat, you went to get their jacket! You were not to give to those who did not deserve it, nor were you to trust anyone. This was the way to make it through life. Oddly enough, we so often fall into this same way of thinking.

Justice today consists of retaliation whether with violence, lawsuits, or insults. And, I am so often guilty of partaking in a vengeful way of thinking that I wonder if I have even learned that lesson taught to me in kindergarten: do unto others as you would have them do unto you. How in the world am I going to teach someone else to live, if I am struggling myself? The answer may very well sit within the last words Jesus spoke in today’s passage.

Jesus capped off this message saying, “Be perfect therefore, as your heavenly Father is perfect.” Perfection does not simply mean the highest score possible, nor the unflawed Olympic routine, nor the ideal human physique as assessed by some magazine. No, perfection means completeness or fulfillment. Our God is perfect, without blemish, and also without need. All that God creates is out of God’s good will, over abundance, and overflowing-ness (that is not a word, but you know what I mean). Our call to be perfect, we often think, must be achieved on our own. However, we cannot do this by ourselves, we must do this by relying less and less on our own ability, our own works, and our own laws, so that we may be fulfilled by our heavenly Father who fulfills all!

God is our heavenly Parent who does not just look down at us as we struggle to learn how to live, no our God came to show (and still comes to show) us the way into true fulfillment. Jesus is that way, and he teaches in today’s lesson how to practically go about learning these difficult lessons—ones that I hopefully will learn, so I may teach my child. When someone wants to rip out my tooth do not seek retribution. In fact, I should not resist an evildoer. Instead, I must rely on God.

When a man wants to take my coat, do not go to a lawyer, but instead see if he needs a cloak as well. If a woman troubles me to walk with her for a mile, go an extra mile to see what life is like in her shoes. As much as I might question the motivations of people who beg, rely on God instead, and give to all who ask. Perhaps most difficultly in a world in which duality is the normal—a world in which even without trying there are enemies across political, racial, socioeconomic, and religious lines—Jesus calls me to “Love [my] enemies and pray for those who persecute [me]” (Matthew 5:43).

The things that Jesus said are hard, impossibly hard even. And, I am well aware that some of the things he said, maybe all of these things, do not make sense to us. Turning the other cheek, giving to all who ask, loving our enemies, how foolish does this all sound? Paul reminded us though, “[We] should become fools so that [we] may become wise. For the wisdom of this world is foolishness with God” (1 Corinthians 3:18-19). And, if we wish to become children of God we must foolishly continue to love everyone, even our enemies, Jesus said.

So how do we do the impossible? We don’t, or at least not alone. Our fulfilling of these things must come from us relying on God. Our sustenance physically, spiritually, emotionally, and psychologically cannot come from seeing our enemies fail, but by trusting in God and risking everything to boldly love those whom we want to despise or who—we believe—hate us. If we are to grow up into children of God we must become fools for Christ who rely not on ourselves, but on the overabundance of God. Turn the other cheek, give to all who beg, love your enemies, and be fulfilled children of God, just as our heavenly Father fulfills us!